Tuesday, February 3, 2009

3rd time's the charm

'Third time's the charm' as the saying goes. But what makes the 3rd time lucky? I was thinking about my 'lucky' 3's. It took me 3 times of starting my Bachelor's degree to finally finish it. I started at BYU as a 17 year old, a little later at CSU Sacramento until I got pregnant with James, and then finally finished after the divorce--graduating in 1986. Same for my Master's. One start for School Psychology/MFCC, a second for Educational Administration, and finally, the completed degree in Educational Technology. Significantly, Steve is my third try at marriage. So is it all 'luck', a 'charm'?
Luck connotes something whimsical or out of control of anyone. I am certain that in all of the cases of being successful on the 3rd try, volition was involved, and therefore luck was, well, out of luck. What was operational in all of the examples given was choice, hope, and perseverance.
With my Bachelor's degree, I chose to begin, and chose an environment that was nurturing to my awakening spirituality. I also chose to take a moratorium, afraid to make a mistake in my choice of career. But I also had hope that I would eventually figure out my path, and I would return to continue my education. Before I knew James was going to be born, I felt it was time to forge that path. I still did not know which direction to go, but the hope for a future of fulfillment was guiding me to that choice. When I found out I was expecting, I continued my plan to return to school, knowing it would only be for a semester, again with hope that my opportunity would come in the future. At that season, I chose to mother my children.
The connection between choice, hope, and perseverence for me is this: whether our choices lead us in the direction we had thought, or in some other way, a vision or goal will keep us focused with hope. By keeping that positive vision and joining that vision with perseverance, we make that 'charm' occur.
So third time's the charm? No. The third time is simply often the culmination of choosing not to give up, having hope for the important goal to be fulfilled.

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